The Bling Ring (2013)

The Bling Ring
Director: Sofia Coppola
Writer: Sofia Coppola
Based on: Nancy Jo Sales‘ article The Suspect Wore Louboutins
Cast: Katie Chang, Israel Broussard, Emma Watson, Claire Julien, Taissa Farmiga, Leslie Mann, Gavin Rossdale

Plot:
Marc (Israel Broussard) is new to his school but quickly connects with Becca (Katie Chang). The two of them obsess over fashion and celebrities together, which leads to them heading to Paris Hilton’s home when they know she isn’t there. They find the key, they enter, they steal a bit, they tell their friends about it. And then they return and take their friends with them. Pretty soon, robbing celebrities becomes a regular thing for all of them.

I’m not a big fan of Coppola’s work and this movie proved to me again why that was the case. It was weird and boring and generally pretty damn awful.

The-Bling-Ring

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Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters (2013)

Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters
Director: Thor Freudenthal
Writer: Marc Guggenheim
Based on: Rick Riordan‘s novel
Sequel to: Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief
Cast: Logan Lerman, Alexandra Daddario, Brandon T. Jackson, Douglas Smith, Leven Rambin, Jake Abel, Anthony Stewart Head, Stanley Tucci, Nathan Fillion, Yvette Nicole Brown, Robert Knepper, Grey Damon, Ron Perlman, Octavia Spencer, Craig Robinson

Plot:
After his success with Zeus’ lightning bolt Percy (Logan Lerman) has yet to have another big success, much to his chagrin and Clarisse’ (Leven Rambin) enjoyment. But then things get quickly out of whack: Percy’s half-brother Tyson (Douglas Smith), a cyclops, shows up. Camp Half-Blood is attacked by the not-dead-after-all Luke (Jake Abel) and its magical barrier starts failing. It’s Clarisse who gets tasked with finding the Golden Fleece to save the camp, but fueled by a prophecy Percy, Tyson, Annabeth (Alexandra Daddario) and Grover (Brandon T. Jackson) go on the same quest.

Sea of Monsters, much like the first film, was pretty nice the most time, but also ultimately not great or awesome. There is nothing really wrong with it and it did have a great supporting cast, but I didn’t connect with it all that much.

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Re-Watch: Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief (2010)

Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief
Director: Chris Columbus
Writer: Craig Titley
Based on: Rick Riordan’s novel
Cast: Logan Lerman, Brandon T. Jackson, Alexandra Daddario, Jake Abel, Sean Bean, Pierce Brosnan, Steve Coogan, Rosario Dawson, Catherine Keener, Kevin McKidd, Uma Thurman
[Here’s my first review.]

Plot:
Percy Jackson’s (Logan Lerman) life is far from perfect. He’s dyslexic, suffers from ADHD and his mom (Catherine Keener) is married to an asshole. And then Percy finds out that his father is the god Poseidon, his best friend Grover (Brandon T. Jackson) is a satyr and his teacher (Pierce Brosnan) is a centaur. But that’s only the start of his adventures since Zeus’ (Sean Bean) lightning bolt was stolen – and everyone thinks it was Percy who did it.

On re-watching the film it is at the same time less infuriating but also less fun than the first time round. It’s nice, but it also feels completely inconsequential. It’s the kind of film you watch and you don’t mind seeing it but you never think of it again as soon as it’s done.

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The Lone Ranger (2013)

The Lone Ranger
Director: Gore Verbinski
Writer: Justin Haythe, Ted Elliott, Terry Rossio
Based on: the radio show
Cast: Johnny Depp, Armie Hammer, William Fichtner, Tom Wilkinson, Ruth Wilson, Helena Bonham Carter, James Badge Dale, James Frain

Plot:
John Reid (Armie Hammer) is a lawyer by vocation. He believes in everything the law stands for. In his capacity as prosecutor, he’s accompanying the infamous murderer, cannibal and generally awful human being Butch Cavendish (William Fichtner) who was finally apprehended and is supposed to be hung in John’s hometown. Also on the transport is Tonto (Johnny Depp), a Comanche accused of nobody knows exactly what. When Cavendish manages to escape, it leads to the unlikely and very reluctant team-up of Tonto and John, who becomes The Lone Ranger.

Before going into the film, I only heard awful things about it. Starting with the casting of Johnny Depp as a Native American to the general dumbness of it. So my expectations weren’t high, but I was willing to give the film a try because I like Verbinski’s other stuff. But it turns out that all the terrible things were true.

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Kick-Ass 2 (2013)

Kick-Ass 2
Director: Jeff Wadlow
Writer: Jeff Wadlow
Based on: Mark Millar’s and John Romita Jr.’s comic
Sequel to: Kick-Ass
Cast: Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Chloe Moretz, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Lyndsy Fonseca, Morris ChestnutClaudia Lee, Donald Faison, John Leguizamo, Jim Carrey, Iain Glen

Plot:
After the events in the last film, Hit-Girl aka Mindy (Chloe Moretz) now lives with her father’s best friend Marcus (Morris Chestnut) and pretends to be a normal high school girl. But instead, she’s fighting crime and training Dave aka Kick-Ass (Aaron Taylor-Johnson). But Dave is dreaming of a superhero-team-up. And when Chris, formerly know as Red Mist (Christopher Mintz-Plasse), decides to become the world’s first supervillain The Motherfucker, a team-up seems to become absolutely necessary.

I was really looking forward to this film. But I spent most of it in horror at the way they twisted the characters and the story and left the movie quite disappointed. It’s not that bad per se, but it rubbed me the wrong way in so many things.

kick-ass-2

[SPOILERS]

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Re-Watch: Kick-Ass (2010)

Kick-Ass
Director: Matthew Vaughn
Writer: Jane Goldman, Matthew Vaughn
Based on: the comic book by Mark Millar and John Romita Jr.
Cast: Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Chloe Moretz, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Mark Strong, Nicolas Cage, Lyndsy Fonseca
[Here is my first review.]

Plot:
Dave (Aaron Johnson) is a normal teenager who likes to read comic books and gets beat up a lot. But then one day he decides that, actually, nothing is keeping him from donning a superhero suit and changing the world for the better. This seems to work fine for about 30 seconds and then Dave is in over his head.

Damn, I had forgotten just how fricking awesome this film is. I still have a couple of issues but I left the film absolutely hyped. It’s fantastic.

kick-ass

[SPOILERS]

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Kick-Ass 2 (Mark Millar, John Romita Jr.)

Kick-Ass 2 is the sequel to Kick-Ass and Hit-Girl. It was written and drawn by Mark Millar and John Romita Jr. [Here are my reviews of all things Kick-Ass.]

Plot:
While Hit-Girl is living in forced retirement and spends her time as Mindy (apart from her training sessions with Kick-Ass), Kick-Ass aka Dave is dreaming of a superhero team-up. Which he is finally able to get with the Justice Forever group. At the same time, Chris Genovese is done with his preparation of becoming a supervillain and really starts with being The Motherfucker. He, too, assembles a team of villains to surround him and does his best to terrorize New York and finally get his revenge on Kick-Ass.

Kick-Ass 2 is way darker than Kick-Ass and it is a darkness that the series really, really needed. Sometimes it is just fucked up, though. But most of the times it finally gives me the consequences that I missed in the first book.

kick-ass2

[SPOILERS and Trigger Warning: Rape]

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Parked (2010)

Parked
Director: Darragh Byrne
Writer: Ciaran Creagh
Cast: Colm Meaney, Colin Morgan, Milka Ahlroth, Stuart Graham, Michael McElhatton

Plot:
Fred (Colm Meaney) spent much of his life working in the UK. When he returns to Ireland, he has nowhere to live but his car. But no address, no benefits and so Fred is stuck, trying to make his life into as much of a normal routine as he can. Until young Cathal (Colin Morgan) parks next to him. Cathal is pretty much constantly high and basically the antithesis to Fred, but somehow they take a shine to each other and Cathal is able to get a bit more movement into Fred’s life.

Parked is not a film that surprises you much. It goes pretty much down the way you’d think. But it tells its story with a lot of sensitivity for its characters and their situation and it has two great lead actors, so you don’t really care that you basically knew the story before seeing it.

parked

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Möbius (2013)

Möbius
Director: Eric Rochant
Writer: Eric Rochant
Cast: Jean Dujardin, Cécile De France, Tim Roth, Émilie Dequenne, Vladimir Menshov

Plot:
Alice (Cécile de France) is an American trader in a Russian bank in Monaco. She had to leave the USA after less than legal trades, a circumstance which makes her the target of the FSB who would like to take down the bank’s owner Ivan Rostovsky (Tim Roth) for money laundry. But there are two things that make this more difficult: one, the FSB doesn’t know that Alice is already working for the CIA. And two, FSB leader Moise (Jean Dujardin) starts an affair with Alice.

kathrintha, with whom I saw the film, summed it up perfectly, so I’m gonna just steal it: “It’s sad when a film just falls flat on it’s pretentious face halfway to So-Bad-It’s-Good.”

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Where I Belong (2012)

Where I Belong
Director: Fritz Urschitz
Writer: Fritz Urschitz
Cast: Natalie Press, Matthias Habich, Johannes Krisch, Karl Fischer, Cornelius Obonya

Plot:
Because of World War 2 Rosemarie (Natalie Press) came to the UK from Austria with her father Friedrich (Matthias Habich), when she was just a little girl. Her father still dreams of being able to return to their villa in Austria, while they live in pretty poor circumstances. One day another exiled Austrian and friend of Friedrich’s, Anton (Johannes Krisch) shows up and Rosemarie falls in love. But she still isn’t sure where her place in life is.

Where I Belong tries pretty hard, but unfortunately fails in most aspects. The end product had me rolling my eyes so much, I got vertigo. Makes me pretty glad that I won tickets for the showing instead of paying to see it.

whereibelong

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