I’m not watching Eleventh Hour, but after this, I might start:

Eleventh Hour is a CBS show about science, for all values of “science” that actually mean “Rufus Sewell.”

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It is both the genius and the scourge of this show that even when the science rings true, the rest of it is delightfully appalling. When the hardest-working actor on the show is Rufus Sewell’s googly eye, you know the situation’s dire, and it doesn’t help that they’re constantly having to dramatically deliver lines like, “There’s a fungus among us.” (Actual line.)

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However, they more than make up for the lack of quality by supplying more and more outlandish plots, taken more and more seriously. This week Eleventh Hour gave in to the inevitable and did an entire episode about frozen heads. It was beautiful.

The episode ostensibly revolves around Dr. Rufus’s investigation into the death of a young woman who was found on the beach, frozen stiff from the inside out. Possible causes are discarded: they include attack by air conditioner, medication side-effect, and “something she drank.” To be fair, it’s easy to mistake vodka and Freon.

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The highlight of this episode is clearly the conversation amongst the floating heads, but a close second is the scene in which Dr. Rufus and Marley are driving to whatever place in Malibu looks like Vancouver. (Note Dr. Rufus’s seductive “summer blizzards happen; also, my wife died” routine, famous for getting him chicks.)

Great, great, great… how I love trash!