Answering Questions Asked Through Google XXXV

Every time when I think that I can scrap this feature because people have finally understood that typing whole questions into search engines is an excercise in futility, the questions are back. *le sigh*

“is the movie jcvd in anyway biographical”?

Yes and no. The situation in the beginning of the movieVan Damme fighting for custody (though in reality he has a son, not a daughter), only getting crappy roles in crappy movies etc. that’s pretty true. (Though I don’t know if Steven Seagal really cut his ponytail for a role and therefore booted Van Damme out.) The whole robbery thing – no, that didn’t really happen.

“what is my favorite disney movie?”

Well, how the hell should I know what your favourite disney movie is? At that, how should anyone but yourself find that out?

“what is the difference between a buffalo”?

I’m pretty sure that this question was cut off. If not, it’s another genius example of what we call Anti-Humor here in Austria. I love it.

Other examples would be:

  • A pig goes round a corner and is gone.
  • A man gets on the bus, drives for five stations, gets off and goes into a shopping center. When he comes out again, the bus is gone.
  • Two scyscrapers sit in a cellar and knit oil. What is wrong with this picture?
    Fish don’t have wings.

And now, there’s

  • What’s the differenc between a buffalo?

JCVD (2008)

JCVD is a fictious biographical movie about Jean-Claude Van Damme, starring the man himself, directed by Mabrouk El Mechri.

Plot:
Jean-Claude Van Damme (Jean-Claude Van Damme) is a washed-up action star. He only gets parts in movies he doesn’t actually want to make, and often loses them to Steven Seagal. His personal life is in ruins, too: He’s fighting for the custody of his child, he has no money and things seem to be closing in on him. When he decides to go back to Brussels to take a break and go for a fresh start, he gets caught up in a robbery of the post office – and the police think he’s the one doing it.

JCVD is an astonishing movie. Not only are you surprised that Jean-Claude Van Damme can act, it’s also nice to see that he doesn’t take himself too seriously. But none of this would have been possible without Mabrouk El Mechri, who wrote a phenomenal script and shot the movie in a way that treats Van Damme with sensitivity and respect, but makes a little fun of him, too.

jcvd-poster

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