No, I’m not going to post about the pope himself. Or any of the other people who call themselves that, or have it as their last name. Or the antipope. [Which makes me think – if the pope and the antipope ever met, would they obliterate each other?]

I’m going to post about two comics. No, not about Inhuman Ahura, although he’s nicknamed Pope. Dammit, I always thought there was only one pope, but man, how I have been wrong. Anyway, instead of continuing to say what I’m not posting about, I’ll tell you what I’m posting about.

The Incredible Popeman.

I’ll let that sink in for a bit.

Ready? Good.

The Incredible Popeman is a comic by Colombian Rodolfo León Sánchez. It is meant to be a tribute to John Paul II. Yes, you read that right, a tribute. Although I seriously, seriously doubt that, because, come on, the Popeman wears holy lycra and special chastity underwear.

Yes. the spanish title is Homopater. That should say it all.

The plot goes like this: JP II dies, but is reborn as a superhero (which apparently didn’t improve his physique). Before he can go out to save the world, Batman and Superman show up (yes, I’m not kidding!) to teach him how to be one. And then the everlasting battle against Satan starts.
Unfortunately, the comic is only available in Colombia and Poland, although the US and Canada expressed interest to publish it, when it came out in 2005.

Amazingly enough, this was not the first attempt to convert the pope to superheroness.

There’s the Battle Pope, which thankfully is not being serious and actually sounds like a really fun read. The plot (wiki):

The book tells the tale of a hard drinking, womanizing Pope condemned by God for his own evil ways, who is called to action to save Saint Michael, with the help of Jesus H. Christ, becoming mankind’s final hope in a world overrun by demons following the Rapture.

Then there’s a “private” site, which must have been the first one in this series (started 1998). It’s not a comic, but scripts you probably could make a comic of.

Here’s a quick excerpt of how the Pope got his super powers:

Door opens and a group of nerd lab technicians enter pursuing John-Paul George’n’Ringo.
Main Nerd: We want our money back – nude juggling my arse.
Nerds: Snort, what’s happening in here?

Lab operator is shocked and leans on a button on the control panel.
Main Nerd: Oh my God! The pizza oven, its reached critical mass! Its going to explode!

BOOM!
Bing.
John Paul: Pizza’s done. Hmmm, Hawaiian.
Main Nerd: I feel all funny. My whole body, tingling. Power flowing. Acme clearing. Muscles growing. Oh, no their not, my mistake. The power. The Power! THE POWER!!!!!
2nd Nerd: Stop shouting. It’s 10:47.
John Paul: My good God. My balls have dropped. And my staff. Its growing, its growing, ITS GROWING! I feel the power! I feel the VIAGRA!
Main Nerd: HE’S RIGHT, LOOK AT HIS STAFF. WE ALL MUST BE GAINING SUPERPOWERS DUE TO THE EXPLOSION. BUT HE SEEMS TO BE SUCKING UP ALL THE POWERS. ITS LIKE HE’S A CREATION OF GOD!!! HEY, BE CAREFUL WITH THAT THING, YOU NEARLY TOOK MY EYE OUT!

In the light of this, I just would like to say, “May the Pope save us all!”