San Andreas (2015)

San Andreas
Director: Brad Peyton
Writer: Carlton Cuse
Cast: Dwayne Johnson, Carla Gugino, Alexandra Daddario, Ioan Gruffudd, Archie Panjabi, Paul Giamatti, Hugo Johnstone-Burt, Art Parkinson, Will Yun Lee, Kylie Minogue, Colton Haynes
Seen on: 29.5.2015

Plot:
Ray (Dwayne Johnson) is a rescue helicopter pilot, a father and most recently a divorcee. His ex-wife Emma (Carla Gugino) and their daughter Blake (Alexandra Daddario) just moved in with Emma’s new boyfriend Daniel (Ioan Gruffud) and anyway, Blake is about to move to college. But when the biggest earthquake in recent history hits the west coast, it becomes Ray’s only mission to save his family against all odds, even if said family is much less helpless than one might think.

[SPOILERS, at least if you can’t guess the plot from other movies of the same ilk]

On the surface San Andreas is pretty standard fare: as the world falls apart, the heroic dad saves his family and thus wins back his ex-wife (whose new boyfriend is an idiot anyway). And I wouldn’t blame anybody if they decided to leave it at that, throw their hands up in exasperation and maybe avoid the film altogether. But personally I thought that there was a little more to the film than appeared at first. Also, the special effects were really cool.

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Love, Rosie (2014)

Love, Rosie
Director: Christian Ditter
Writer: Juliette Towhidi
Based on: Cecelia Ahern‘s novel Where Rainbows End
Cast: Lily Collins, Sam Claflin, Suki Waterhouse, Tamsin Egerton, Art Parkinson, Christian Cooke

Plot:
Rosie (Lily Collins) and Alex (Sam Claflin) have always been best friends, so the thought that they might be in love with each other seems extremely weird. But every once in a while both have to think about it – only never at the same time. And every time either of them find themselves in love with the other, life just seems to have something completely different in mind for them. But despite all the very different developments in their lives, they keep coming back to each other.

Love, Rosie is exactly what you’d expect from a Cecilia Ahern-based RomCom. That is to say, prepare for romance, sweetness and tears and if you don’t think too hard about it, you’ll leave the cinema completely satisfied.

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Dracula Untold (2014)

Dracula Untold
Director: Gary Shore
Writer: Matt Sazama, Burk Sharpless
Based on: Bram Stoker‘s novel (in the loosest sense of “based”)
Cast: Luke Evans, Sarah Gadon, Dominic Cooper, Art Parkinson, Charles Dance, Diarmaid Murtagh, Thor Kristjansson

Plot:
When Vlad (Luke Evans) was a child he was enslaved by the Turks, despite being a prince, to ensure his father’s allegiance. He was raised to be a soldier and became such a good one that people nicknamed him The Impaler and he is finally allowed to return home. But when the Turks call for slave soldiers again, Vlad cannot consent – which means war. To be able to defend his family and his country better, Vlad makes a deal with a monster (Charles Dance) in a cave: for three days he will have the strength and abilities of a vampire while still alive. If he can resist the temptation to drink human blood in that time, he’ll even return to being human. But will three days be enough to defet the Turks?

I know going in that Dracula Untold was going to be the kind of film where I’d need vodka, so I wisely packed it. Rarely have I been so glad about my foresight because I needed every damn drop of it. In short, the film was really, really bad.

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Dark Touch (2013)

Dark Touch
Director: Marina de Van
Writer: Marina de Van
Cast: Missy Keating, Marcella Plunkett, Padraic Delaney, Art Parkinson, Ella Hayes
Part of: /slash Filmfestival

[TW: Child Abuse – no explicit mention of it in this review, but it’s in the film, also not very explicitly but unmistakable]

Plot:
Niamh (Missy Keating) lives with her family in a house in which weird tstuff is happening – things are moving that shouldn’t move at all. And then one night, the house attacks the family. It is destroyed in the process and Niamh is the only one to survive. But the troubles seem to be following her even to her new foster family.

Ugh, Dark Touch was fantastic but one of those films where you really feel that you need a drink after you’ve seen it. It’s painful and really, really good.

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