Joe (Nicolas Cage) is an ex-con who managed to build up a successful, if illegal woodchucking business. He generally plays a rather big role in his community. When Joe is approached by 15 year old Gary (Tye Sheridan) who admires him and asks for a job for his and his alcoholic, violent father (Gary Poulter), Joe gives him a chance. But not everybody loves Joe and Gary gets caught up in the middle.
Joe (the movie) didn’t work for me. Mostly because Joe (the character) didn’t work for me at all. Which has less to do with Nicolas Cage and more with the script but in any case it makes the film pretty much unbearable.
The princes Fabious (James Franco) and Thadeous (Danny McBride) couldn’t be more diffirent. While Fabious goes on quest after quest (and always returns successful), Thadeous tries to live life as responsibility-free as he can. From his latest quest, Fabious brought back Belladonna (Zooey Deschanel) who has spent her life in captivity, held by the evil Leezar (Justin Theroux) who plans to use her for a ritual. Fabious and Belladonna want to get married but before they can, Leezar steals her back. So Fabious goes on yet another quest – only this time he drags Thadeous along.
This movie was so extremely bad, I don’t even have words for it. The first time I thought about turning off the film was about 30 minutes in. But then Natalie Portman hadn’t shown up yet and I kinda kept assuming that this movie had to become funny at one point or another. It never did. Instead it continued to be absolutely dreadful.