A Christmas Prince: The Royal Baby (2019)

A Christmas Prince: The Royal Baby
Director: John Schultz
Writer: Karen Schaler, Nate Atkins
Sequel to: A Christmas Prince, A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding
Cast: Rose McIver, Ben Lamb, Alice Krige, Honor Kneafsey, Kevin Shen, Momo Yeung, Sarah Douglas, Theo Devaney, John Guerrasio, Tahirah Sharif, Joel McVeagh, Richard Ashton, Raj Bajaj, Crystal Yu, Madra Ihegborow
Seen on: 28.12.2019

Plot:
Things are going well for King Richard (Ben Lamb) and Queen Amber (Rose McIver) – they are expecting their first baby and could not be happier. But before the baby’s arrival, they still have a very important duty to fulfill: King Tai (Kevin Shen) and Queen Ming (Momo Yeung) are coming for a state visit to re-sign the treaty that has ensured peaceful relations between their two kingdoms for centuries. But when the treaty goes missing, not only is at a diplomatic catastrophe, but it also means that a curse hangs over the unborn baby.

After having seen A Christmas Prince: The Royal Baby, I felt like I had hit rock bottom – but in the way that I had finally firm ground under my feet again and was thus able to finally walk away from the Christmas movie bonanza that had started to worry me. This is not a recommendation for the film as a movie, but if you should find yourself in the same situation I was in, it might be the emergency ejector seat that you need.

The film poster showing King Richard (Ben Lamb) and Queen Amber (Rose McIver) who cradles a notable baby bump.

The Royal Baby dials pretty much everything the other two movies had up to 11. Including and especially, the racist undertones. That was especially the case in the way Amber interacted with Ming: because Amber has started to make her own kingdom more progressive by allowing women to ascend to the throne (wow, the revolution) and generally being a feminist heroine (ahem), it was decided that she should sign the treaty this time around instead of Richard. And she encourages Ming to do the same. Ming – who appears to be every stereotype of the meek Asian woman – balks at the idea while Tai is all for it because seh does deserve recognition. And I don’t think I have ever seen anything more condescending than that white woman teaching an Asian woman many years her senior to be more assertive, claim what’s her due and generally be a feminist. I wanted to retch.

The rest of the plot is equally headdesk-worthy, starting with the missing treaty (I get that it is very symbolic, but just because the two kingdoms don’t sign the historic piece of paper doesn’t mean that they actually have to go to war if neither want to) that was supplemented with a curse on the baby because apparently, the threat of war wasn’t dramatic enough. But even the subplots seem tired. Or maybe I was tired at that point.

King Richard (Ben Lamb) and Queen Amber (Rose McIver) opening Christmas presents.

I don’t know if The Royal Baby is really, objectively, any worse than the other two film of the series, but as I sat in front of it, feeling unable to move, one thought kept creeping into my head: “what are you still doing here???” And I knew I had to get out. No more Christmas movies for me.

And honestly, in that sense watching The Royal Baby was the perfect film to watch at the end: because there wasn’t a second of regret in my quitting Christmaslandia afterwards.

King Richard (Ben Lamb) and Queen Amber (Rose McIver) in front of the castle, greeting guests.

Summarizing: Just don’t.

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