Love, Simon (2018)

Love, Simon
Director: Greg Berlanti
Writer: Elizabeth Berger, Isaac Aptaker,
Based on: Becky Albertalli‘s novel Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda
Cast: Nick Robinson, Jennifer Garner, Josh Duhamel, Katherine Langford, Alexandra Shipp, Logan Miller, Keiynan Lonsdale, Jorge Lendeborg Jr., Talitha Eliana Bateman
Seen on: 12.7.2018

Plot:
Simon (Nick Robinson) could and should be living a care-free life. He has a nice family (Jennifer Garner, Josh Duhamel, Talitha Eliana Bateman), great friends (Katherine Langford, Alexandra Shipp, Jorge Lendeborg Jr.) and school is going pretty well, too. But there’s one thing that is weighing on his mind: Simon is gay. He has never told anyone. When another boy comes out as gay under the pseudonym “Blue”, Simon starts messaging him – an exchange that has far bigger consequences than he ever thought.

Love, Simon is a cute, feel good movie that would be pretty run of the mill if it wasn’t for the fact that it’s about a gay teenager. It could have been more revolutionary, but we also need the sweet, inconsequential stuff in queer and not just in straight, so I definitely enjoyed it.

Film poster showing Nick Robinson in front of a red background.
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Safe Haven (2013)

Safe Haven
Director: Lasse Hallström
Writer: Leslie Bohem, Dana Stevens
Based on: Nicholas Sparks‘ novel
Cast: Julianne Hough, Josh Duhamel, Cobie Smulders, David Lyons, Mimi Kirkland, Noah Lomax

Plot:
Katie (Julianne Hough) is on the run. While Det. Tierney (David Lyons) is searching for her, she manages to escape and ends up in a small town in the middle of nowhere. She decides to settle down there for a bit, however uneasy. Soon she starts a friendship with her neighbor Jo (Cobie Smulders) and with the town’s grocery store owner Alex (Josh Duhamel), a widower with two kids. But Katie isn’t safe yet.

You know, there are the kind of Nicholas Sparks movies where you might feel a bit ashamed to admit it, but they do touch you in all their unabashed cheesiness (case in point: The Notebook. How I bawled!). And then there are the films like this one where it’s all just too much and you can’t take it seriously anymore at all.

SafeHaven

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Movie 43 (2013)

Movie 43 (it’s a comedy anthology with the following segments)
Writer (for the most parts): Rocky Russo, Jeremy Sosenko, Steve Baker
The Thread (in the European version, that’s the framing device; in the US, I gather, it’s a different story)
Director: Bob Odenkirk
Cast: Devin Eash, Adam Cagley, Mark L. Young
The Catch
Director: Peter Farrelly
Cast: Kate Winslet, Hugh Jackman
Homeschooled
Director: Will Graham
Cast: Liev Schreiber, Naomi Watts, Jeremy Allen White
The Proposition
Director: Steve Carr
Cast: Chris Pratt, Anna Faris
Veronica
Director: Griffin Dunne
Cast: Kieran Culkin, Emma Stone
iBabe
Director: Steven Brill
Cast: Richard Gere, Kate Bosworth, Aasif Mandvi, Jack McBrayer
Superhero Speed Dating
Director: James Duffy
Cast: Justin Long, Jason Sudeikis, Uma Thurman, Kristen Bell, Bobby Cannavale, Leslie Bibb, John Hodgman
Machine Kids
Director: Jonathan van Tulleken
Writer: Jonathan van Tulleken
Middleschool Date
Director: Elizabeth Banks
Cast: Chloe Moretz, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Patrick Warburton, Matt Walsh
Tampax
Director: Patrik Forsberg
Writer: Patrik Forsberg
Happy Birthday
Director: Brett Ratner
Cast: Johnny Knoxville, Seann William Scott, Gerard Butler
Truth or Dare
Director: Peter Farrelly, Patrik Forsberg
Cast: Stephen Merchant, Halle Berry
Victory’s Glory
Director: Rusty Cundieff
Cast: Terrence Howard
Beezel
Director: James Gunn
Cast: Elizabeth Banks, Josh Duhamel

Plot:
Calvin (Mark L. Young) and his best friend JJ (Adam Cagley) wanted to trick his little brother Baxter (Devin Eash) by making him look for a supposedly banned film that doesn’t actually exist – Movie 43. But Baxter actually finds something, and as they move from clip to clip they come ever closer to the truth.

People, heed my warning. I thought that a movie with that cast couldn’t possible be as bad as the trailer. “There must be something there,” I thought. “Something redeeming. It can’t possibly be all dick jokes, scatological humor and misanthropy?” Now I laugh in the face of my naivité. Because that really is all there is to this film: people behaving like disgusting assholes and we’re supposed to laugh about it. And all that remains after seeing the film is a question: Why? Why would anybody want to make such a film? Why are any of the actors involved in this? Why would anybody think that shit is funny? WHYYYYY????

movie-43

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When in Rome (2010)

When in Rome is the newest movie by Mark Steven Johnson. [I guess after Daredevil and Ghost Rider, it was the only logical choice.] It stars Kristen Bell, Josh Duhamel, Danny DeVito, Will Arnett, Anjelica Huston and Lee Pace.

Plot:
Beth (Kristen Bell) is successful, an up-and-coming curator at the Guggenheim Museum (an awesome job, btw). Of course that also means that she’s an emotional idiot, unable to have a relationship or even appreciate love. You know how it goes. Anyway, she flies to Rome to her sister’s wedding, where she meets the totally cute best man Nick (Josh Duhamel). But then Nick gets kissed by a mysterious plot device lady in red, Beth gets drunk and next thing you know, she’s in a fountain, stealing coins and enslaving men with their love to him (which she gets from the coins, OF COURSE).

When in Rome is actually pretty bad. But Kristen Bell is charming and it managed to wrangle some laughs from me so I guess that’s a yeah? Well, it might would have been if the genius responsible for the casting decided that out of Josh Duhamel and Lee Pace, Josh Duhamel would get the lead.

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