Jungle Cruise (2021)

Jungle Cruise
Director: Jaume Collet-Serra
Writer: Michael Green, Glenn Ficarra, John Requa
Cast: Dwayne Johnson, Emily Blunt, Edgar Ramírez, Jack Whitehall, Jesse Plemons, Paul Giamatti, Veronica Falcón, Dani Rovira, Quim Gutiérrez, Dan Dargan Carter, Andy Nyman
Seen on: 30.7.2021

Content Note: colonialism

Plot:
Lily (Emily Blunt) is a scientist, an archaeologist and an adventurer – even if the establishment doesn’t want to hear her theories about the Tears of the Moon, a mythical tree that can supposedly cure all ills and that she is sure isn’t just a myth. Not even when she sends her brother MacGregor (Jack Whitehall) to speak for her to academia. But with the discovery of a long-forgotten relic, Lily is sure that she can find the Tears of the Moon, even if she has to deploy creative methods to get it. Soon, she and MacGregor make their way to the Amazonas river where they hire skipper Frank (Dwayne Johnson) and his boat to get them to the tree. But they are not the only ones after the Tears of the Moon. And Frank comes with his own troubles, too.

Jungle Cruise was super entertaining (in a surprisingly gory way). I honestly didn’t expect to have as much fun with it as I did, even if the film isn’t without issues. But I’d say, the entertainment outweighs the issues by far.

The film poster showing drawings of Frank (Dwayne Johnson) and Lily (Emily Blunt) in front of a jungle background. Below them, we can see Frank's boat going over some rapids, as well as other characters in the film, much smaller.
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Murder on the Orient Express (2017)

Murder on the Orient Express
Director: Kenneth Branagh
Writer: Michael Green
Based on: Agatha Christie‘s novel
Cast: Kenneth Branagh, Daisy Ridley, Leslie Odom Jr., Penélope Cruz, Josh Gad, Johnny Depp, Derek Jacobi, Michelle Pfeiffer, Judi Dench, Olivia Colman, Willem Dafoe, Sergei Polunin, Lucy Boynton
Seen on: 24.11.2017
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Plot:
Hercule Poirot (Kenneth Branagh) is supposed to take the Orient Express to travel from one case to his well-earned vacation. But as luck will have it, there’s a murder right there on the train. As it is stopped by an avalanche, Poirot takes up the case, determined to find out who among the illustrous guests was responsible for the death of Edward Ratchett (Johnny Depp). Unfortunately, the case is anything but straightforward as Poirot soon discovers.

Murder on the Orient Express starts off strong enough, but with every further plot twist, the film seems to slip more and more out of Branagh’s control. The result was mostly meh with a couple of shiny moments.

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Blade Runner 2049 (2017)

Blade Runner 2049
Director: Denis Villeneuve
Writer: Hampton FancherMichael Green
Based on: Philip K. Dick‘s novel Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?
Sequel to: Blade Runner
Cast: Ryan GoslingHarrison FordRobin WrightAna de Armas, Dave BautistaEdward James OlmosJared LetoHiam AbbassMackenzie Davis, Lennie JamesBarkhad Abdi
Seen on: 15.10.2017
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Plot:
K (Ryan Gosling) is a replicant who works as a blade runner – a section of the police tasked with hunting down rogue replicants and killing them. During one of those hunts, K finds evidence that there was a replicant who managed to reproduce sexually: she became pregnant and had a child which was believed to be impossible. K’s superior officer Joshi (Robin Wright) fears the repercussions if that fact became wide knowledge and tells K to find the child and kill it. This leads K to question his own past as well.

Blade Runner 2049 was so incredibly boring that I could barely stand it. Since it’s also racist and sexist, it probably would have been better if it hadn’t been made at all.

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Logan (2017)

Logan
Director: James Mangold
Writer: Scott Frank, James Mangold, Michael Green
Based on: Mark Millar and Steve McNiven‘s comic series Old Man Logan, which is in turn based on the character Wolverine created by Roy Thomas, Len Wein, John Romita Sr. and the Marvel Comics X-Men series
Sequel to: the X-Men movies
Cast: Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Dafne Keen, Boyd Holbrook, Stephen Merchant, Elizabeth Rodriguez, Richard E. Grant, Eriq La Salle, Elise Neal, Quincy Fouse
Seen on: 8.3.2017

Plot:
Mutants have been practically eradicated. There are only a few left – those who manage to hide very well. One of them is Logan (Hugh Jackman), whose age is starting to show in the decreased tempo of his healing. He takes care of Xavier (Patrick Stewart), whose age is in turn showing in the dementia he developed. They are constantly at risk of being discovered. When Logan is asked to drive the young Laura (Dafne Keen) to Canada, he smells trouble and tries to refuse. But Laura won’t let herself be refused. She is like Logan in many ways and definitely a mutant. And she is pursued by an organization that means her harm. Laura forces Logan to face the world and his place in it.

Logan is probably the most emotionally mature superhero film, at least of recent years. Nevertheless, I’m not quite as taken with it as many other people were.

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Green Lantern (2011)

Green Lantern is Martin Campbell‘s adaptation of the DC comics. The film was written by Greg Berlanti, Michael Green, Marc Guggenheim and Michael Goldenberg and stars Ryan Reynolds, Blake Lively, Peter Sarsgaard, Mark Strong, Tim Robbins, Taika Waititi, Michael Clarke Duncan, Geoffrey Rush and Angela Bassett.

Plot:
Hal Jordan (Ryan Reynolds) is a fighter pilot and basically the definition of irresponsibility. One day Hal stumbles upon a dying alien, Abin Sur (Temuera Morrison). Abin Sur is a Green Lantern, an intergalactic police force. His power source is a ring that can harness will power and which choses Hal to be Abin Sur’s successor. So Hal gets drawn into the world of the Green Lanterns and their biggest foe Parallax (Clancy Brown).

Green Lantern is not a particularly good film. Fortunately for its entertainment value it’s a pretty craptastic film. Would it have hurt if it had made a little more sense? [Topless Robot pretty much takes apart all the plot holes. In a very entertaining way.] Probably not. But then the movie would have had to leave out a few of the bad green screen scenes in front of fake sunsets – and really, who would want that?

[SPOILERS]

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